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DrMutschler
DrMutschler, Dr. Med.
Kategorie: Medizin
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MY husband n I been together for 5 years married for 3..he

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MY husband n I been together for 5 years married for 3..he just got back from afgahnistan6 month ago...but he was so happy to come back to his family!! About 2 weeks ago i noticed chances in him he was here with me but not really here..til he told me he wasnt happy anymor..he said he loves me from all my heart ..but he dosent know y he is so unhappy. So he packed a few things n said that he would be livin in the army buildings til he can figure out why he isnt happy anymore. I dont know what to do! Should i give him the time to think bout things? he still text me everyday sayin he loves me n think bout me..but that he's not feeling better. he already been talkin to a chaplin n such such..but everybody been tellin him that he have to find out for himself whats right or best for him... im just so afraid that he is leavin the kids n me!! he is my soulmate he even said that too... im so lost..what can i do?


we live in germany right now.this where is duty station in located.he said that so many things are crushin down on him.he misses his family in the staates..also we lost our son in 4 month of my pregnancy...
now we tried for 5 month to have a baby again but nothin happend yet an he also given himslef the fault for it!I wanna give him all the space he needs but is that good? I mean im scared that he will distant hisself more and more from us! I love him so much and i dont wann lose my husband.He said that its something he have to do...also that its nothin I done to make him feel that way.he already seen a chaplin but they all tell him to do whats right for him.So i really cant do anything but wait and see what his decision going to be.
Gepostet: vor 6 Jahren.
Kategorie: Medizin
Experte:  DrMutschler hat geantwortet vor 6 Jahren.
IHello there,

I think your husband is in the unlucky situation of developping a depressive mood disorder, which can really be a follwing reaction of the war situation in afganistan.
It is called the "gulf war syndrome" , because seen that time in these circumstances for the first time.
Today we know, that this is
1. partly a psychologic disorder
2.partly a physiological, biochemical disorder in the body of a person. It can be measured in blood lab tests.

This reaction scares you, shure. And, he is scared too by these changes.

He needs , same as you need ,-- psychological understanding and treatment.
But, beeing sick, it is difficult to think clear and to find the deep emotions and to express them.
It can be very helpful to have first a clear diagostic approach , the biochemical lab tests and also the treatments, following that.

Then , there is energy back to have family treatments, as psychological treatments, together as a couple,-- but also single meetings for him.

With that way, he may soon be back in his energy .

So, hope, this will help you through this difficult time!

Go and look to find scecialists in your area! Military hospital?
Heidelberg? Landstuhl?

In any case, you should go and have one or two psychological meetings with a psychologist.
This helps you to clear and get the power you need now.

Best wishes!

Dr Mutschler

Please, do the "accept button" if this was helpful for you.
Thank you
Experte:  DrMutschler hat geantwortet vor 6 Jahren.
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